Submerge, to emerge, as your Inner Queen is allowed to shine
To enjoy your life fully. To have confidence and trust, to create, a life you love living and that satisfies your deeper inner being. To enjoy your body and share it with your partner. And know that you make decisions from a place of true self worth and wisdom.
Hi, I'm Hilde
I am single mum to my two children, a Transformational Health Coach and an entrepreneur. I grew up in Norway, and came to Australia to go to University when I was 21. Having traveled and seen some of the world, studied Social psychology, Yoga and Early Childhood development, I was drawn to Coaching as a career and got certified in 2013.
“Our stories are magnificent pieces of art”
Today I work with women who have lost the relationship to their deeper Woman. From working with Women and parents over the last 15 years, I know that what I went through is not unique. Almost every woman loses herself in the roles they play. Mother, Lover, Friend, Wife, Child… are some of the roles of life. But BEFORE we are any of those, we are WOMAN. Let me tell you a little bit about me, because I know so many other women of my generation who can recognise themselves in my story. And if my transformation can inspire and heal you, as it has healed me, then every bit of struggle has been worth it.
Our generation didn't draw the longest straw when it came to conscious parenting. Most of us as kids, were physically disciplined, and put down for our qualities and strength. At school we were told we were stupid if we weren't teachers favourite, at home we were told to be quiet, sit still, look pretty, make house and let our man make the money. This was my typical childhood. I grew up with a message that told me loud and clear that I was not good enough as who I was, and I would never succeed in anything unless I conformed. Being myself and expressing as who I was, was not approved of. So the only way I found connection and love from those around me was by being what I thought they wanted me to be. And I continued that chase well into adult age.
To continually chase others approval is a dangerous game. I was so lost, and so confused. When the time came to play the game of the adult, I had no idea how to do that. What I did know was the inner struggle. Consistent conflict that made me seek an emotional numbing. I couldn't make decisions because I didn't know my own strength. I didn't value myself enough to create healthy boundaries in relationships, not able to say NO. This had detrimental effects on my health, physical and mental. And I learned that this keeps us going around in circles, and we make the same mistakes across areas of our lives. Romantic relationships, work situations, friendships, financial dependence and sex lives.
We can not run way from ourselves and keep avoiding, we have to face the pain, and embrace our inner compass, our inner queen.
In my 20's I enjoyed traveling and came to Australia to study. I supplemented by working in hospitality and found it a fun way to keep avoiding dealing with my deeper pain, the focus was on other people and it fascinated me! My 30's saw me having 2 children as well as a successful business teaching Yoga at childcare centers, for just under 10 years. I took a Diploma in early childhood education and became a teacher of Yoga and its related philosophies. When being in the world of children, play, magic and loving relationship is easy and necessary. Through dealing with children and their parents, I came to understand that the relationship we have with ourselves, directly manifests in our outer relationships and life scenarios as well. The practical relationship between our minds and our hearts creates our world, and conflict arise when we are not honest with our hearts first. Frustration, anger, depression.. stem from this initial conflict. And the conflict is us not listening to ourselves, but rather to someone else. I could finally start to understand my own childhood (and parents), and healing had begun however unbeknownst to me! I was still numbing my pain in various ways such as food, drink, intellectual conversation and reasoning.
All this conflict had to blow the lid off at some point. Isn't it ironic how severe disaster almost has to happen before we realise our own stubborn neglect...
Actually, I will say that Yoga and meditation saved my life. A good few years ago now, I survived an inevitable Break-down. A painful time that I can only speak about without shame, now, after years of healing. Sometimes I don't know which is worse, the life leading up to it, or the breaking apart of what I deeply believed was the fabric of my life, the shock of realisation.. Recovery has taken years. And now I see that it also takes courage and patience, compassion and more patience. And strong support from people around me. It brought angles to show up and take my hand, it takes stripping back of learned mental patterns and inner dialogue, it takes facing the pain. But, it is worth it! We can only go so high if we have gone so low..
A key to deeper healing was breaking down the barriers that kept me from communicating my truth. Understanding this was pivotal to my whole health and is also an integrative part of how I now Coach.
For years, I was too ashamed to talk about my pain. I had hit rock bottom, but still couldn't face the truth. There was too much shame in being vulnerable and honest about not keeping it together. The daily panic in my stomach left a barrage of health problems and gut issues. Not even my friends knew what was really going on inside of me. I felt I should be able to pull myself together. Cultural conditioning of stoicism and victim mentality kept me going in circles, being unable to move forward and actually take steps to create a real life for myself and my children.
I felt alone and afraid. I was reactive and sad, keeping myself busy with the lives of my children to avoid dealing with my sadness. I was subtly but desperately numbing with alcohol, diet, buying things I didn't need, always seeking.
Then one day, the penny dropped. In a free Coaching session, I finally realised that I could do something real for myself. For the first time I felt supported, not judged, I became aware of how my SELF, was not allowing myself to be free..
Receiving support is a superior lesson to learn for us women. Our cultural conditioning teach us that we should be strong in the face of adversity, and keep it together for the sake of our children, or our parents, or partner. But this is our biggest downfall. Because it means we neglect and avoid our gentle and wise selves. And avoiding this quality is also avoiding being who we are and being authentic as Women. Its a female quality!
My transformation had begun. It was a difficult leap, but necessary, and I did know that deep down. All the hidden and avoided emotions of my past, had to be recognised and let go of. I learned to let it go. I learned to tap into my power and believe in myself. I learned to live in the presence and ultimately, I fell in love with myself again.
I didn't have to do it by myself. There was someone there that could help me, and support me, and that didn't judge me, and who also, was not afraid of my power!
It is my background in Social psychology, Yoga and meditation, Childhood development, personal healing and therapy, Coaching and never ending study, that facilitates the results of personal transformation and health in my clients.
Now, dearest Woman, this could be YOUR opportunity to take charge of your own health and life. To transform the wounds and the pain, into joy, confidence and trust, and to get so much more from your life!
Being a Queen means being courageous and brave, as well as taking DEEP care of our selves.
I have created a 12 week program, based on my own process and the help of Naturopaths, a Coach, and other powerful Women that has embraced their own journey to empowered living. This program will guide your journey to become an empowered woman also. It will give you the tools to become a Queen in your own life. 12 weeks of inner work to nurture your soul into a shining expressive and loving woman. To grow from being a princess needing to be saved, into a Queen that can save herself. Learning to receive and to love without needing approval or anything in return, and creating a life you absolutely LOVE by making the right decisions for yourself.
Learn to trust, find your passion and voice underneath the noise of the past, and find your truth by letting go and transmute the pain.
Go through to my Program page here, and see what you will get from your time of inner exploration and unfolding. You can send me an email to firstname.lastname@example.org, if you want to have a chat with me.
Sincerely, your fellow Queen